Monday, March 30, 2009

Friday, March 27, 2009

My guess is he has a non asian girlfriend and he wants to break-up with her but just doesnt know what to say...obviously this book would have all the answers right?

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

quick question

who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I am gonna squeeze one of those weird looking dangly things and drink whatever comes out"??
whoever the mr. man was, thank you, because with some chocolate flavoring up in it, the stuff tastes real good. ooh and im about 95% sure you went through a hole lot of discrimination (cause i dunno about you but it seems like an extremely homosexual thing to do) so kudos go your way for sticking to your guns and not letting the Haters get you down.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

'Venn Diagram'

So in my english class we have been doing this compare and contrast type jazz. Basically you choose two things/people and you write down what they have in common and what differences they have then write an essay about it (and yes it is as boring as it sounds). The teacher makes us do it on this thing called a Venn Diagram, which everyone one was familiar with bar me. Most people compared stuff like cats and dogs or high school and college. My boy Dontae choose to compare some stuff that was a bit more entertaining, which you gotta do when your tryin to be the class clown and all. Anyway this is the one that made me laugh...

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Show me the moneyyy

And wipe that lame smirk from your grill

Im Hooked

Well unlike what seems to be everyone in the world, i Do Not own an iphone or ipod touch. but i am fortunate enough to own a regular old ipod! although i shouldn't call it a regular old ipod because this little jem is equipped with in my opinion the best, most explosive game available on any pod (exaggerating never hurt) I got The Sims Pool on my shit!

The Sims Pool is a lot of fun, and really brings something different to the mix when it comes to iPod games. Well not so much, but when I am board in class or weeded up and lookin’ for some quick fix entertainment I look no futher then the games section on my measly old ipod.

In conclusion I just want to make it clear that I did not pay the $4.99 on itunes to buy this game (which to me is priceless) I gotta give a shout out to Reilly who accidently brought it while he was in the states, thinking it was a game for his fancy ipod touch. It kinda reminds me of that saying….one man’s trash is another man’s treasure!

Monday, March 9, 2009

Last Night A Reese's Saved My Life

It was around 11:30pm when I first started to feel myself slipping. It had been around 3 hours since I had eaten anything and the hunger effects of the blunt I finished smoking half an hour ago were really starting to kick in.

I found I was struggling to concentrate on the movie I was watching, the strange grumble and groan sounds my stomach was making were drowning out the sound of the television. All I could think was how much I wanted to eat. I was imagining myself eating a Double Burger from In-and-Out. Picturing the hot beef patty with cheese melted on top of it, tomato, lettuce and the famous secret sauce all in a delicious lightly toasted bun was making me feel like I could not go on living without it. But In-and-Out Burger was closed and therefore not an option. Looking back I would have been too lazy/high to make the journey there anyways.

Merely thinking of food was not going to give me the satisfaction I was so desperately searching for. I needed to gather my thoughts and take care of business. But being in the state that I was, cooking was not an option. This left me in a predicament that I dread with all my heart. The situation where all you want is something/anything good to eat but at the same time don’t want to put any effort towards the issue due to your mind state at the time. So I was left with only one option and not a very good one at that. I forced myself out of my bedroom where it was cozy/warm and stumbled into the kitchen, desperate to find a source of food that did not require any additional effort by me. In other words something to eat that I did not have to cook. I searched the dark kitchen high and low; I examined the cupboard for around 5 minutes to no prevail. My worst dreams were looking like a reality; I was going to be forced to go to bed with the munchies.

After getting distracted by the instructions for making tuna casserole on the back of, quick and easy tuna casserole box (which I was obviously not going to cook up) I slowly walked back into my room. As I was sitting there dealing with the fact that I was gonna be going to bed on an empty stomach I remembered something. I remembered buying a Reese’s at school earlier that day. But for the life of me I could not remember eating it. Had I eaten it straight after buying it and just not remembered? Had I eaten it after lunch as a delicious treat for desert? Or maybe just maybe I had not eaten it and it was chilin’ in the bottom of my bag waiting for me and only me.

My bag was in the corner of my room; I rushed over and began to search through it. In the first compartment all I found was pens, pencils and old tootsie roll wrappers (at that time I would have been happy with just one tootsie roll). In the second larger compartment I found the homework I was meant to do that night. I was down to the third and final pocket I opened it expecting to be disappointed but to my surprise and delight there it was the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. If only there was a camera there to take a picture of my face. I can’t think of a time when my smile was as big. Then I proceeded to eat it, quicker than the speed of sound.

My mission was complete just as I thought I would have to give it up. A Reese’s saved my life…



Saturday, March 7, 2009

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

"Oaksterdam"

If your a weed head who seems to always find themselves asking, "why does this marijuana stuff do all these different things to my mind and body?" or if your an up and coming dealer who wants to brush up on your growing skills. then this is the College for you

From class focussing on Politics/Legal Issues to classes that teach you all you need to know about Distribution/Dispensary. Oaksterdam University has it all. but before applying at this school of champions you may want to find out if you qualify.


The following Reqirements must be met by ALL Applicants -

• Must have at least one years experience of being a stoner (this does not include smoking only on weekends)
• Cold Chilin’ must be one of your favorite things to do
• Experience in the art of rolling and chopping
• Consider yourself to be more creative when high then when sober
• Have previously dropped out of High School or another College
• Have a criminal record
• Own any form of game consoled (e.g. PS3, Sega Mega drive and Xbox)
• Your diet is “whatever is easy, quick to make and tastes half decent”
• You get paranoid about pointless things
• Rather get high then go out and do something productive

We here at Oaklsterdam hope to see your red eyes and smiling faces around the campus sooon!